Wesley’s Three Simple Rules: A Blueprint for Thriving Small Churches

John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, developed a set of guiding principles known as the General Rules of the United Societies. These rules were intended to shape the lives of early Methodists, helping them demonstrate the work of the Holy Spirit through both inward transformation and outward action. Wesley’s three simple rules are:

1. Do no harm.

2. Do good.

3. Attend upon all the ordinances of God.

The first two rules are relatively straightforward—Christians are called to avoid causing harm to others and to actively seek opportunities to do good. However, the third rule, “attend upon all the ordinances of God,” required further explanation. Wesley defined this as engaging in spiritual disciplines such as public worship, hearing the Word, receiving the Lord’s Supper, personal and family prayer, reading Scripture, and practicing fasting. These practices were meant to cultivate a deep, transformative relationship with God.

In more recent years, Bishop Rueben Job rephrased the third rule as “stay in love with God” to make it more accessible. While this wording differs from Wesley’s original intent, it captures the heart of the rule—remaining deeply connected to God through worship and spiritual disciplines.

David Watson emphasizes that Wesley’s rules were never meant to be legalistic obligations but rather “signs of an earnest yearning for salvation” and a true desire to live a life transformed by grace. However, Wesley himself warned that these rules must not become mere external acts of righteousness. In his sermon on the Sermon on the Mount V, he cautioned that without inward transformation, external adherence to the rules would amount to nothing more than “the righteousness of a Pharisee.” True holiness, according to Wesley, begins in the heart and naturally expresses itself in outward actions (Watson, 2016).

For smaller churches, these three simple rules provide a timeless and practical framework for thriving in their communities. By avoiding harm, actively doing good, and cultivating a deep love for God, churches can create a welcoming, mission-driven culture that effectively reaches those around them.

Do No Harm: Building a Culture of Grace

The first of Wesley’s Three Simple Rules—Do No Harm—seems obvious, yet it is one of the most challenging to practice consistently within a church community. While most congregations would never intentionally seek to harm others, unintentional harm can often occur through division, judgmental attitudes, or resistance to change. Church hurt is a reality many people have experienced. As the Church, we need to own that, repent and do better. These behaviors, left unchecked, can weaken a church’s witness and make it difficult to reach the surrounding community effectively.

Unintentional Harm in the Church

Smaller churches, like any group of believers, can sometimes develop habits that, while well-meaning, create barriers to spiritual growth and outreach. Long-standing traditions, close-knit relationships, and established ways of doing things can sometimes make new guests feel like outsiders. Additionally, conflict, whether over leadership decisions, theological differences, or personal preferences, can lead to division if not handled with grace. When churches focus more on maintaining comfort than embracing the mission of Christ, they risk becoming stagnant and resistant to the new ways God might be calling them to serve.

A judgmental spirit can also be a stumbling block. When a church creates an environment where people feel they must meet certain expectations before they belong, it sends a message contrary to the grace-filled gospel of Jesus. Churches must constantly evaluate whether their words, attitudes, and actions align with the love and hospitality they are called to embody.

Fostering Unity, Kindness, and a Welcoming Spirit

To truly “do no harm,” a church must intentionally cultivate a culture of grace—one that prioritizes unity, kindness, and radical hospitality. This doesn’t mean avoiding difficult conversations or compromising on core beliefs, but rather committing to treat one another with love and respect.

Unity in a smaller church is essential because every member plays a vital role in the body of Christ. A divisive or critical spirit can weaken the entire congregation. Instead, churches should strive to create an atmosphere where differences are approached with humility, and disagreements are handled with a desire for reconciliation rather than resentment.

Kindness should be the defining characteristic of every church. Whether interacting with longtime members or first-time guests, an attitude of grace and patience reflects Christ’s love. A warm welcome, a genuine conversation, and an openness to new perspectives can make all the difference in how someone experiences the church.

A welcoming spirit extends beyond Sunday services. Smaller churches can intentionally embrace their communities by making it clear that all are invited, all are valued, and all have a place. When people feel safe and accepted, they are more open to experiencing God’s transformative love.

Practical Steps for Smaller Churches

1. Create a Safe Space for Newcomers and Diverse Perspectives

   • Ensure that new guests are greeted warmly without feeling pressured.

   • Encourage small groups or hospitality teams to intentionally connect with newcomers.

   • Avoid language or traditions that assume everyone understands church customs.

   • Be open to hearing different life experiences and theological viewpoints with grace.

2. Address Conflicts with Grace and Reconciliation

   • Foster an environment where concerns can be voiced respectfully.

   • Encourage leaders to model healthy conflict resolution through honest, compassionate discussions.

   • Offer mediation or prayerful guidance when tensions arise.

   • Remind the church regularly that unity in Christ is more important than personal preferences.

3. Emphasize Love Over Legalism

   • Teach and model that faith is about a relationship with Christ, not just a list of rules.

   • Avoid harsh judgments over secondary issues and instead focus on growing together in discipleship.

   • Encourage a posture of listening before correcting—helping people experience grace before expecting transformation.

By committing to do no harm, smaller churches can create a culture of grace that not only strengthens their own members but also serves as a powerful witness to their communities. When people see a church that values love over division, kindness over criticism, and unity over personal preference, they see a reflection of Jesus—and that is the most powerful outreach any church can offer.

Do Good: Being the Hands and Feet of Christ

The second of Wesley’s Three Simple Rules—Do Good—calls believers to actively seek opportunities to bless others. It is not enough for a church to avoid harm; it must also be intentional in doing good. For smaller churches, this principle is especially powerful. While they may not have the resources of a megachurch, they often have something even more impactful: a strong sense of community, deep relationships, and a heart for service. By focusing on strategic, compassionate outreach, small churches can make a lasting difference in their neighborhoods and beyond.

Small Churches, Big Impact

Many small churches feel limited in their ability to serve due to budget constraints or fewer volunteers. However, history proves that God uses the faithful, not just the large. Time and again, Scripture reminds us that what seems small in human eyes can be mighty in God's hands (Matthew 17:20). A smaller congregation can still change lives, strengthen communities, and spread the love of Christ—often in ways that larger churches cannot.

The key is to be intentional. A small church may not be able to fund a massive outreach program, but it can love its neighbors well. Whether through a single act of kindness or an ongoing ministry, a commitment to doing good will bear fruit.

Examples of Community Outreach

Small churches can demonstrate the love of Christ through practical acts of service that meet real needs in their communities. Here are a few impactful ways to "do good" in tangible, life-changing ways:

• Food Ministries: Many families struggle with food insecurity. Hosting a food pantry, weekly meal, or community garden can provide nourishment while building relationships.

• Supporting Local Schools: Churches can adopt a local school by providing supplies, mentoring students, praying for teachers, or offering after-school programs.

• Caring for the Elderly: Many seniors experience loneliness. A simple ministry of visiting nursing homes, assisting with home repairs, or organizing intergenerational events can bring them comfort and companionship.

• Helping the Homeless: Whether through providing hygiene kits, partnering with shelters, or offering job training, churches can extend Christ’s compassion to those in need.

• Disaster Relief & Crisis Care: Smaller churches can mobilize quickly in times of crisis by offering a safe place, collecting donations, or helping with clean-up efforts.

The most important thing is to ask the community what it needs rather than assuming. A small church should prayerfully discern its calling in outreach, ensuring that efforts are sustainable and impactful.

Encouraging Everyday Acts of Goodness

Doing good is not just about church-organized ministries—it’s about a lifestyle of kindness. Each member of the church should feel empowered to live out their faith in practical ways every day.

Here’s how small churches can encourage their members to be intentional about doing good:

• Teach that service is worship—help members see that small acts of kindness (helping a neighbor, encouraging a coworker, checking in on someone in need) are part of living out their faith.

• Share stories of impact—celebrate testimonies of members who have made a difference in simple but profound ways.

• Issue “Do Good” challenges—encourage people to find one person each week to serve, whether by buying a meal, writing a note of encouragement, or simply listening to someone in distress.

• Equip people with ideas—provide practical lists of ways they can serve at work, school, and in their daily interactions.

The Power of Partnerships

Small churches often feel the pressure to do everything on their own, but kingdom work is not a solo effort. One of the best ways to multiply impact is by partnering with other churches and community organizations.

Some ways small churches can collaborate for greater effectiveness include:

• Working with other churches—Joining with fellow congregations to host community-wide events, share resources, or tackle bigger projects.

• Connecting with nonprofits—Many Christian and secular organizations are already doing great work. Partnering with food banks, crisis pregnancy centers, or after-school programs can expand a church’s reach.

• Joining city initiatives—Local governments often have service opportunities that churches can support, from neighborhood cleanups to mentoring programs.

• Engaging denominational networks—Leveraging broader church networks can provide training, volunteers, and financial resources.

By working together, smaller churches can accomplish far more than they ever could alone. The goal is not to build a church’s reputation but to advance the kingdom of God by meeting tangible needs in Jesus’ name.

Living Out the Call to Do Good

Ultimately, doing good is a reflection of Christ’s love. Jesus himself “went about doing good” (Acts 10:38), and as His followers, we are called to do the same. When a church—no matter its size—commits to serving selflessly, it becomes a light in the community, a place where people experience God’s love in action.

By embracing this simple rule, smaller churches will not only strengthen their witness but also create a culture of compassion that draws people closer to Christ. In the end, it’s not about how big a church is, but how big its love is. And love, expressed through acts of goodness, has the power to transform both individuals and entire communities.

Stay in Love with God: The Heartbeat of Mission

The third of Wesley’s Three Simple Rules—“Stay in Love with God”—is the foundation for both “Do No Harm” and “Do Good.” Without a deep, abiding love for God, all other efforts become hollow. Wesley originally phrased this rule as “attend upon all the ordinances of God,” meaning that believers should faithfully engage in the practices that keep their faith strong: worship, prayer, Scripture study, communion, fasting, and fellowship.

For small churches, this rule is especially crucial. A church cannot thrive in its outreach unless it is first deeply rooted in worship, prayer, and discipleship. The strength of a congregation’s mission is always tied to the strength of its spiritual life.

Spiritual Formation: The Lifeline of a Thriving Church

If a church’s heartbeat is weak, its mission will be weak. Spiritual formation is what keeps the church alive and growing, ensuring that its mission is fueled not by human effort alone, but by the power of the Holy Spirit.

A small church can sustain a thriving and transformative ministry by prioritizing spiritual growth through:

• Consistent and Passionate Worship – Worship is not just a Sunday activity; it is a way of life. Churches that keep worship central will experience renewed vision, strength, and purpose.

• Scripture as a Daily Guide – Regular Bible study—both individually and corporately—deepens faith and provides wisdom for church leadership and direction.

• Discipleship as a Priority – Discipleship should not be an afterthought. Churches must equip members to grow in faith, mentor others, and live out their calling.

• Developing a Culture of Prayer – Prayer must be more than a formality—it should be a defining characteristic of the church’s identity.

Small churches have a unique advantage when it comes to spiritual formation: they can foster deep, personal connections. Unlike large congregations where people can feel lost, smaller churches can create tight-knit, supportive faith communities that encourage and challenge one another.

Fueling Mission Through a Deep Love for God

When a church is in love with God, it cannot help but love its community. A passionate pursuit of God naturally leads to a passion for His mission.

Consider how spiritual vitality fuels outreach:

• A Church That Prays for Its Community Will Serve Its Community – Prayer leads to action. Churches that consistently intercede for their town will become more aware of its needs and more willing to meet them.

• A Church That Immerses Itself in Scripture Will Embody Christ – The more a congregation is shaped by the Word, the more it will reflect Christ’s love, justice, and mercy.

• A Church That Worships with Authenticity Will Witness with Power – Genuine worship renews hearts and fuels evangelism.

Wesley understood that spiritual disciplines are not empty rituals—they are lifelines that keep the church spiritually strong and outwardly focused. Churches that neglect spiritual formation will eventually lose momentum, but those that stay in love with God will be sustained for the long haul.

The Connection Between Worship and Community Transformation

Worship is not just about what happens inside the church walls—it spills over into the community. A worshiping church becomes a beacon of hope, demonstrating God’s love in action.

Here’s how worship impacts community transformation:

• When a church is filled with God’s presence, it becomes a refuge for the hurting.

• When a church truly worships, it embodies Christ’s love, which draws others in.

• When a church encounters God in worship, it gains boldness to engage in mission.

Smaller churches must resist the temptation to view worship as just another weekly gathering. Instead, they should see it as the source of all ministry and mission. The more deeply a church loves God, the more effectively it will love people.

Living Wesley’s Third Rule: Staying in Love with God Every Day

So how can smaller churches cultivate a deep, lasting love for God? Here are some practical ways:

1. Encourage Personal Spiritual Practices – Preach and teach about the importance of daily prayer, Scripture reading, and personal worship.

2. Strengthen Corporate Worship – Make Sunday worship meaningful, participatory, and Spirit-filled, creating an atmosphere where people encounter God.

3. Invest in Discipleship – Equip members not just to attend church, but to grow into fully committed followers of Christ.

4. Make Prayer a Core Priority – Develop regular prayer gatherings, prayer teams, and a culture where seeking God is the norm.

5. Celebrate Testimonies – Share how God is moving in the church and the community to inspire others to stay engaged in their faith.

The Key to a Thriving Church

Wesley’s Three Simple Rules are more than just principles—they are a way of life. If small churches want to thrive in reaching their community, they must:

1. Do No Harm – Foster unity and grace.

2. Do Good – Actively serve and love others.

3. Stay in Love with God – Keep worship and discipleship central.

By staying connected to God, smaller churches will not only survive but flourish, transforming both their members and their communities.

A church that stays in love with God will never lack purpose, power, or passion. It will naturally become a light in the darkness, a refuge for the weary, and a force for kingdom impact.

A Call to Action: Living Out Wesley’s Three Simple Rules

As you reflect on Wesley’s Three Simple Rules—Do No Harm, Do Good, and Stay in Love with God—consider how your church can embody these principles in new and meaningful ways. What would it look like for your congregation to fully embrace these values?

Here’s the challenge: Commit to one new initiative in the coming months that aligns with these principles. It could be:

• Creating a welcoming and grace-filled atmosphere for visitors.

• Launching or expanding a community outreach project to serve those in need.

• Strengthening prayer and discipleship within your church.

No matter the size of your church, small steps in faith lead to big transformations. Take time to pray, discuss with your leadership team, and take action toward renewal and growth.

I’d love to hear how you’re putting these ideas into practice! Join the conversation in our Facebook group, Leadership Edge for Smaller Churches, and share your thoughts and experiences. Let’s encourage one another in building churches that truly reflect Christ’s mission.

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